I’ll Do It My Way: In Response to the Response

When I chose to write a book on Aamir Khan, I always knew it would be controversial. Not simply because he is an actor whose work has impacted Hindi cinema, but because he always seems to evoke two extreme responses – adulation or extreme dislike (on the belief that his work is overrated and his positioning pseudo).

So just as I am grateful for the attention this book has received as the Landmark No 1 Non-fiction Bestseller (For almost two months in a row), a Crossword Non-Fiction Bestseller and its debut amongst Nielsen Bookscan’s top non-fiction bestsellers, I realize that I must accept both the criticism and the praise that this book has received with equal grace and humility.

However, there seem to be a few myths doing the rounds and I would like to respond to them as if I don’t set the facts right about my own book, nobody else will 🙂

1. “I’ll Do It My Way” is not a biography. It is a filmography – as all the summaries released by the publisher will tell you – and should read/evaluated/reviewed as such. A filmography does not dwell on the man Aamir Khan, it looks at his work. So readers who expect me to examine all the dark rumours around the man will be disappointed. These are not the subject of the book – not because I was too scared to investigate them, but because they were not an area of interest. My passion is cinema – both film-making and the rationale behind it – and that’s what this book is about
2. Am I die-hard Aamir fan/admirer? Not really… So I can say that I did not care for some of his recent films like RDB, Ghajini or TZP (and many others too!). But as an objective film researcher, I cannot ignore their impact, especially if it has been very clearly documented.
3. So is the book only “in praise” of Aamir Khan. That is not true – unless one is so prejudiced by one’s own views that one is not able to take a balanced perspective. For instance, one of my favourite interviews in the book is with Mahesh Bhatt – simply because it is amongst the most objective voices. Mahesh appreciated Aamir’s sincerity and commitment, but seemed to find Aamir’s search for perfection exhausting – even as Mansoor Khan provides a different take on the same subject (without any knowledge of what Mahesh had said before this). The debate between the two views is interesting. Then, later, for the first time, directors like Dharmesh Darshan, Indra Kumar and even Mansoor talk about certain filming decisions taken in conjunction with Aamir that were mistakes. So we see that while Aamir has made cinematic decisions that have worked well with audiences in the recent years, there have been mistakes as well. Just as there were many poor film choices in the early and middle phases of his career. This book touches on all that too. Infact, this is more than most existing books on Indian actors have done so far.
4. A review in Deccan Chronicle insinuates that Amol Gupte was dropped from the list of interviewees because Aamir Khan/his office edited the list of interviewees. That is not true and borders on defamation. Aamir Khan’s office did not suggest that I drop anyone… But they did suggest that I include directors Muragadoss, Rajkumar Hirani and Vidhu Vindod Chopra. As I had begun working on this book much before Ghajini was released, they were not on my original list and it worked well for the book that this was pointed out.
5. So why was Amol Gupte not included in my list of interviewees? Only because in MY view he was not a director, producer or principal actor in Taare Zameen Par. My interest was in how the film was made, and there was sufficient documentary coverage from the producers in the public domain that allowed me to analyze this aspect.
6. Incidentally, my modus operandi was to try and get every director whose film was being included in the book to give me some commentary on his/her film. If directors like Ashutosh and Farhan are not in the book, it’s because they were busy and could not give me their time. Ditto with Juhi Chawla! In fact, for the record, the person I tried hardest to reach while writing this book was not Aamir, it was Juhi. But her secretary was unable to put us in touch over a period of two years. Incidentally, Juhi did not interview for the only other book that currently exists on Aamir — “Aamir Khan: Actor with a difference” by senior film journalist Lata Khubchandani. On the subject of interviewees, I would also like to point out that none of the directors I spoke to were interviewed for the previous book by Lata as well. In fact, this particular panel of interviewees is unlikely to be put together again. As a documenter of Hindi cinema, I believe that this makes the book significant — both in any study of Aamir’s work or his films.
7. Aamir collaborated with the book in some way. No… He did not. This book was an independent research initiative. Aamir’s office was only aware that I was working on it — nothing more. I even paid for all the expenses/travel related to the book on my own, and till the end I believed that I could have to self-publish it. Just because the stance is positive does not mean that it is less independent or researched. Anyone who has read my previous work would know that I am a positive person and I like celebrate the best in people. This book reflects that approach.
8. Is the book is a compilation of interviews from film magazines? Hardly! The first information source was live interviews, then came film/video coverage, followed by coverage in the national press and then film magazines. Having said that, I think a researcher is striking a pseudo-intellectualist stand if they believe that film journals are beneath them. Film journals reflect popular culture and can be a rich and extremely interesting source of information as they capture nuances that are sometimes missed by mainstream media. Typically, any quote that I have used in the book is not an isolated statement. It is corroborated by other interviews that he has given over the years.

When it comes to my work on creating the book, I am grateful that I got to write this book from a non-film background as this gave me the freedom to write my book without any prejudices. I started with a clean slate, and if at the end, my conclusion was not ‘negative’ or ‘darkly sinister’ enough to suit either the cynic or the traditional film writer, then so be it.  

I also did not have any pre-conceived notions on films like “Dil”, “Raja Hindustani” and “Ghajini”, and responded to them on the basis of both how they were made/how they were received/their impact. It does not matter to me that most people who appreciate “French cinema” better did not find these films appealing enough. In all truth, none of these films appeal to me personally either… But I am ready to look beyond myself and understand that making commercially viable Indian films is also an art that most film critics themselves have never mastered, and these films represent that art and to that extent reflect popular culture.

In fact “I’ll Do It My Way” is a actually a piece of film research, a methodology that I picked up under the Media Studies Department at the London School of Economics. But we also turned that approach on its head to make the book accessible to the lay reader. As I look at the book’s Flipkart journey, I believe that has already happened, and that is this book’s biggest achievement.

Finally, “I’ll Do It My Way” is an Aamir Khan filmography… So this work was begun with the view that Aamir’s work is significant to Indian cinema. The films that were covered in this book were meant to reflect different shades of his work as that was the area of my research. People may have their own views on it, and if this book encourages discussion around Aamir’s craft or even prods someone else to write their own book on the subject, it would have served its purpose.

Learning patience

Seven months after the edited manuscript first lay in my hands and several rounds of approvals later, I’ll Do It My Way seems to have cleared all hurdles. The book is finally ready for press.

We are still waiting for a few final pictures for the already-many-times-revised picture section. But the wait finally ends, with the book scheduled to go to press next week.

I’ve gained and lost many things on the working of this book. But if there is anything it has taught me, it is the meaning of patience 🙂

A book comes together

Today’s mail brought the formatted manuscript from my publisher into my inbox. The pictures still have to be frozen. But the finalized manuscript is in my hand and it looks good. As the author, I feel happy to have dedicated the last few years of my life to the making of this book. The moments of deep pain that were sometimes part of this journey seem vindicated.

The most miraculously beautiful part about working on a difficult book is that instant when it occurs to you that you are watching your creative piece finally falling into shape 🙂

It’s a May title

It’s a big moment for me. I’ll do it my way now has a finalized manuscript. We’ve also almost made up our mind on the picture section. The book will also be a May title.

This means that the first dummy copy of the book would be in my hands in May. I’ll finally see the cover and also get my first glimpse of what the layout would actually like. After this comes the planning for the book’s roll out. 

Currently, the book is expected to go for formatting on Wednesday. We’d then have to run through it with a fine comb to carefully eliminate any proofing mistakes. As I’ve learned in my many years as a Communications professional, the quality of any work of art is finally judged by its details. If we get this bit wrong, all the work that went before this would make little sense. We’d still have to live with the description of a tacky product.

But meanwhile, there is still cause for celebration. Slowly, but surely, our goal seems closer still.

Re-editing Round 1: Done

It is finished. And it is perhaps appropriate that I said those famous last words on Good Friday. “I’ll Do It My Way” has been re-edited over the last one month and the revised text has been sent to my editor. We now have an almost final manuscript that needs to be stitched together and sent to the press.

For me the great learning in Round 1 has been about giving a book flow. In the context of this particular book, it’s also been about retaining the book’s rich cinematic content while giving it mass appeal.

My greatest fear – to ensure that the end result of mainstreaming this book has not left us with a pedestrian, soulless piece of literature, lacking in depth. But at this point, I do believe that we have the right balance.

This part of the editing process is really tough because this is where the book you first imagined now has to b re-imagined. Flow that has been taken away has to be given back to the book. Finally it’s about putting your ego aside and acting in the interest of the book.

It’s been a tremendous difficult journey.

The re-editing process

As the writer chisels away to make 70,000 words in a manuscript find their perfect place, battle scarred eyes droop and then squint. But also in the chaos of all those blurred and crossed lines is the first hint that a beautiful book is emerging 🙂

Re-editing a book is tough work. Between the cuts and revisions from your editor, you have to now give the book a new flow. There are so many times along the way when you just feel like giving up. But slowly, as you reach the end of the process, there is that satisfaction of seeing a better book emerge 🙂

Happy birthday Aamir!

I’ve got mail.

Yes, you guessed right! After all that cribbing, it’s my first edited manuscript of “I’ll do it my way”.  I must say that my editor Dipa Chaudhuri has done a great job. The book looks so much better for having passed under her pen.

Incidentally, the edited manuscript reaches me on March 14, 2011. As any Aamir Khan fan would tell you, it’s AK’s birthday today.

Superstitious folk would call it a sign. But let me just say that I am over the moon.

Happy birthday Aamir! We raise a toast to you.

PS. In my excitment I think I forgot to mention, it’s a May title 🙂

The Editorial Review

So what’s been the most painful part of working on this book? You would have thought it would have been the research, the chasing of celebrities, the bad press or the actual writing? As it turns out, it’s the editorial process.

To give you a bird’s eye view into how it worked for me, here goes:

1. June 2010: Send the final manuscript. Told to chop it down by 25,000 words (God grief! Yes… That’s almost a book by itself!)
2. September 2010: Return a manuscript that’s shorter by the mentioned length.
3. Wait.
4. November 2010: Told I’ll have my edited manuscript back by December.
5. Wait.
6. December 2010: Missed deadline.
7. New target – Early January
8. January 2011: Target pushed to mid-January
9. End January 2011: Missed deadline
10. New target 07/02/2011
11. 07/02/2001: Missed deadline
12. New target – Weekend
13. Weekend: Missed deadline
14. New target – What new target????
15. Then, the sound of silence.

It makes you wonder doesn’t it, why would anybody want to be a writer?

Well, I do 🙂

A non-celebrity author writing on a celebrity actor

The most difficult thing in the world is to be a non-celebrity author writing on a celebrity actor. Nothing moves when you are nobody.

I guess if I’d seen the book in this spirit when I started out, I’d never have written it. But that’s not how I started out. It was just my act of love for Indian cinema, through the work of an actor who reflects many of its finest shades.

I knew nothing about the doors that would be slammed on my face and the rollercoaster ride of joy and disappointments that would be all mine on the course of this journey.

I learnt what it was to be made to wait, without an end in sight.

I learnt what it was to be let down by the ones that you trust the most.

I learnt what it was to rise again.

After all, the greatest acts of love don’t always emerge triumphantly from the echoes of loud laughter. They are etched in blood.

The self losing itself, only to find the “self”. Becoming nothing to finally be something.

At the editor’s desk

How do you chop off 20,000 words from an 85,000 word document. That’s the challenge that now lies before me as my editor has reverted with comments on the first draft of my manuscript.

Many of her comments are valid and will add richness to the book. Yet this is a painful job and lots of hard work. So this manuscript is still being shaped as I type.

In the weeks to come, I hope to post some of the interesting bits that do get chopped off onto this space.